Short and Packing Stakes
by Shieldage
Summary: Six Buffy Stories, 100-200 words each


BtVS by Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I don't own the rights to Candyland either ;)

* * *

**Victim (100) **_Featuring an alternate version of the Demon Toth, last seen in "The Replacement"_

Allie the Vampire Slayer, master of languages, dusted the last vampire in the graveyard.

The once proud Tothric clan had been nearly wiped out; the few remaining had been kindly fostered by monks. Unexpectedly all the human members of the Order had been wiped out, leaving only one alive to fulfill their destiny.

Forced to take a risky shortcut, he fired his family's newly enhanced rod.

Allie's dark blonde hair, her mother's shade, crackled green as the Key's energy tore her apart.

**THUD**

"Dawn," Buffy asked, annoyed. "How many times have I asked you to not follow me on patrol?"

* * *

**On the Corner (100) ** _B/X is okay... Here's my bit of fluff :)_

Trouble in Hawai'i had Xander dusting off his old shirts, for 'camouflage' reasons.

Leading his team of Slayers into tropical suburbia, they fought a pair of demon twins and their minions.

_Which one first_, he thought. _May I please have a sign?_

Looking down the deserted road he froze, nearly receiving an axe in his back, before he snapped to.

##

"Xander, why'd you have me fly here," complained Buffy the day after the battle, before she saw the street signs. "Oh, I…"

"Buffy," he asked, sinking to one knee at the intersection of Harris and Summers. "Will you marry me?"

* * *

**Xander, Being Wished At (100) **_Written for calileane's 'what you deserved' Challenge at Twisting the Hellmouth_

"Xander, I can't believe you! I ruined my shoes trying to get you free this time."

"Hey, it's not my fault I keep falling for girls who kidnap me."

"Yes it is."

"Well, at least they have the good taste to turn evil immediately, rather than dragging it out for a few months, like yours do."

"Ugh! I wish you'd get what you deserve!"

"GRANTED!"

"Ooh, pie."

"What just happened?"

"Sorry. Rather than have a vengeance demon committee debate at length over what a specific person actually deserves, we just go to our default position. Giving them their just desserts."

* * *

**Xander, Being Wished At, Again (100)**

"Xander, I can't believe you! You turned my best white blouse pink."

"Hey, I'm sorry. I'm not the best with the laundry. Besides, you're of the female persuasion. You can make it work."

"Yeah, but I need to buy a new white one to go with my best shoes."

"See, I just gave you an excuse to shop."

"Ugh! I wish you would get what you deserve."

"GRANTED!"

##

"Hey... Where'd he go?"

"Your wish of vengeance sent him to Candyland, where he'll find love and become a knight of the realm."

"What, my sweet revenge is giving him just_ice_ desserts?"

* * *

**Choices**

Buffy was staking vampires left and right, but she slipped on a piece of wet moss and slammed her head into a tombstone.

Blood poured from the cut on her head as she turned to face the vampire standing over her.

The vampire had a second to laugh in triumph before a brown-haired man staked him from behind.

"You saved me," she said, still slightly dazed. "Thank you."

"No problems," he said, and walked away, whistling.

##

Later that night, Buffy pulled a vamp off a girl in an alleyway, but the victim was already dead.

With rage in her eyes, Buffy turned to face the vamp, but she recognized his human face.

"_You_, you're the one who saved me. Why?"

"What can I say? You've saved the world, a lot."

Her stake slammed into his heart and he drifted away as a pile of dust.

* * *

**The One With Fangs (200)**

Xander tore the safe from the wall and shuffled through its contents. When he came to the photographs clipped to his birth certificate, shock spread across his face. He walked to the mirror in hopes of comparing the man's familiar features to his own reflection - only to realize that, yes, he no longer had one.

Swearing under his breath he crossed the room and dug through the closet until he found his parents' camera.

##

In the morning, Willow found a video tape glued to her bedroom window.

It turned out to be a recording of Xander sitting in his living room.

##

"Willow. I just wanted to say that I'm leaving Sunnydale and not coming back. I've got nothing to keep me here, certainly not my parents. Oh crap."

He stood up, moving towards the screen. The film jumped, apparently he'd hit the pause button and begun recording again.

"Sorry, I had to behead them. I certainly don't want them to raise, do I?" He chuckled darkly. "Something to note. I'm not really a Harris. My mom was pregnant with someone else's kid. Look." As he raised the photo his features shifted, his vampiric eyes yellowing. "Can't you see the resemblance?"


End file.
